Let's Talk About Dating.

Dating: a primordial way of meeting someone new by spending time with them to determine your compatibility on such important topics as food, family, friends and employment.

I hate dating.

Dating to me is a form of torture. It is similar to waterboarding, in my estimation. Just when you think you are safe, you feel like you are drowning again ... in eminent danger of dying. Dating has followed two very similar paths for me: 1) he really, really likes me. I do not really, really like him or 2) I really, really like him and he does not really, really like me. Either/or is unacceptable.

For example, nearly 18 months ago I gave up dating for a few months because of two horrendous back to back blind dates. The first date and I went hiking in a State Park here in Indiana and followed it up with dinner. Innocuous, right? WRONG>>> actually, it was somewhat muddy that day (as the forest _often_ is) and I wore clothing appropriate to potentially muddy terrain. Each time I had mud on me from, well, hiking, he would point it out, point out how messy I was and then wonder aloud why I would wear such *nice* clothing for hiking. (a tshirt and khaki shorts ... all fully washable). Two hours of this. TWO hours. Then upon our return to Indy, he suggests that perhaps we should have some supper. I agree, and offer up some suggestions near the area where the cars were parked. He says, no, "I want to go to Applebees. Applebees is my favorite restaurant." Yes, he did say that. He was NOT kidding. Needless to say, there was no need whatsoever for a second date.

The other date involved coffee. Having learned my lesson on hiking and Applebees, I agree to meet this guy at Starbucks. He was 29, I was 32. Before he even sits down, he starts telling me how he likes to date women between 25-35, although 'women over 30 are all neurotic and want to have kids right away. You know that their ovaries are drying up.' I kid you not. And yes, he knew my age. It was a very short date although I must admit, I stuck around longer than I would have generally because I was increasingly curious how this man functioned as a human with his backwater way of thinking.

So I stopped dating for awhile.

Have been dating again now for about a year. Although I am interested in sharing my life with someone, I'm not interested in just any someone. That's easy to find.

So I hate dating.