Two weeks ...

Hello out there!

In two short weeks I will wrap up my first year of doctoral work.  Yes.  I can hardly believe it, speak it or even think it. 

What I dreamed of in May 2010 at my dear friend Anna's house is now not only reality, but beyond all my wildest dreams and imagination.

A couple of things ...

yes, I'm alive
no, I still don't have free time yet
yes, I'm ready to be done for the year
no, I am not taking the summer off
yes, I'm writing a paper with one of my professors where I will be *lead* author.  (so excited!)
no, I don't know how long it will take to churn out
yes, I'm hoping it will be published and I'll get some conference presentations out of it.
no, it's probably not a topic you'd find interesting
yes, I find it interesting (social security disability claims)
no, I haven't lost my mind, I do think it is interesting.
yes, you'll hear all about it.  A million times probably.

Yeah, yeah, I'm alive.

Alive.

Teaching one class, attending three of my own.  I sleep, I eat, I travel by train, I attend class, I travel by train, ... repeat.

I continue to love where I live and whom I live with :)  I am a happy, lucky girl.

I'll blog more in mid-March or in May.  My life should be in better condition then. 

Love to all ...

Semester One and Done.

Believe it or not, I am 25% through the coursework I need for my Ph.D.  Yes, just coursework, dear people, as following the end of that, I'm on my own, researching like a madwoman and attempting to make some new argument that will pass muster with my professors. 

So, probably 3.5 years until done.  Maybe a little less, hopefully no more.

I've learned a lot this first semester -- including the fact that my time is no longer my own.  My past jobs were all busy, lots to do, lots of work outside of 'working' hours but this ... THIS ... is another animal entirely. 

I have no free time.  Even while I sleep I am working.  Sounds silly, yes?  Well many many weeks of insomnia coupled with school-related dreams have convinced me that my brain does not shut off as I leave campus or even as I close my eyes.  I have been a perpetual ball of stress these past few months.  I'm not sure if my stomach will ever un-knot itself.  Just thinking of it makes me feel a little nauseated. 

For what?  I've wanted this degree for so long - thought of it, dreamed of it, wished to make it happen.  Now I'm living it and there are days I'm not so sure.  I know everyone goes through this at some point (hell, I've been through it in my working life plenty of times) and I know I just have to buckle down and get things done. 

So here I am.  Today I'm back on campus, just four short days after leaving it for the semester.  I returned today to learn about Blackboard, a web-based system that I'll use for my class this semester.  Yes, I'm teaching, in addition to taking three classes.  I don't know whether this is good or bad, but what I do know is that I'll be busy, no doubt about it.  I'll be on campus four days per week.  Monday - Thursday.  I'll stay up here one night a week (as otherwise the train + sleep + class schedules just don't mesh) and that makes me kinda sad -- but it's okay.  It's one semester.  I can do it.

I often feel like I'm reciting the train song in my head ... I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.

As for Hoosier Guy, well ... he's learned that my brain doesn't shut off, that I'm occasionally in a blind focus about certain topics and that he has displayed great kindness and patience towards me and my school schedule.  I'm glad we are together.  He has made this whole transition easier and I know that we will grow stronger because of this.

My family & my friends?  I'm not sure they know what to think other than it appears I'm busy a lot.  Which I am.

Life as I know it -- so different than I expected and still good.

It's My Birthday!

It has been a completely wonderful, fantastic, unbelievable weekend - truly a whole weekend of happiness. 

My life is good :)

Fun trip to the Museum of Science and Industry + delicious dinner at the Athena restaurant in Chicago's Greektown on Friday to celebrate the Hoosier Guy & my 1st anniversary together.

A day of homework, then a fabulous dinner with Hoosier Guy and his momma on Saturday night -- Hoosier Guy surprised me with some pretty jewelry I'd been eyeing a few weeks back.

Sunday was a delicious lunch prepared by Hoosier Guy to my specifications for his momma, my momma, himself and me.   Coconut Cake TO DIE FOR.  mmmmmm.

Lots of laughs, lots of fun -- enjoyed every minute.

Here's to 38!

There goes October, here comes November

September 29, really?  My last post?

Where has the time gone?

*Another 5,000 pages+ read
*A book review
*Research for three lit reviews
*Reading.  Yes.  Always.
*Sleeping (occasionally)
*Travel to Florida to deliver Grandma to Dad & Stepmom's house
*Visit with friends in Florida
*Travel to Michigan with Hoosier Guy for romantic weekend
*Breathe peacefully for the first time in a month

More later ... I don't know how much later, but later.  Promise

Ridiculous. Just Plain Ridiculous.

I've had a million thoughts in my head since the last post.  I mean, really, probably two million, at least.  I just haven't had the energy to post.  Not on Fridays, not on Tuesdays, not just whenever.

I'm reading something like 1000 pages a week (which, if you add it up, over the course of the semester I will have read at least 16,000 pages or roughly ~ 4,000,000 words.

So maybe I'm out of words here.  For now.  I hate that.

Life update:  I'm good, life is good, loving my existence.  I love the commute into Chicago now - probably because it is so very peaceful and relaxing.  Sure, it takes awhile, but all I have to do is: a) find a seat and b) give my ticket to the conductor.  This isn't rocket science people.

Life with the Hoosier Guy is fabulous.  Truly lovely.  I was nervous (of course) when we first started talking about it, scared to make that jump but even more scared not to.  Here we are, nearly two months in and I just feel like my life is damn near perfect.  I'm happy I made the move in with him.

Other than reading (which I do constantly), I go to class, work at my graduate assistant job, commute and sleep.  On occasion I do things with friends when we can all find a mutually agreeable time for fun.  This can be difficult but I am trying.

I head back to Florida in a few weeks with my Grandma.  She's moving there with my Dad and I want to make sure she arrives safely.  This should provide some fodder for the blog, fo' sure.

Dear readers, I miss blogging.  I hope to get back to a regular schedule soon.  Or maybe I just OD on blog posting when school is out for the semester.  Who knows?

6 Word Fridays: Move

This week's word is move ... and for me (as well as several fellow bloggers) this is so very appropos!  Thanks Melissa!  http://melissacamarawilkins.com/blog/

I stretch, I yawn, I move ...
slowly from my warm bed, easing out
from beneath a cozy quilt, purring cats,
and away from my Hoosier Guy.

Three days a week I move
from country life to city life
learning more each passing week and
loving every minute of my experience.

Other days I move from couch
to chair for my plentiful readings
require lots of time not moving,
just sitting, grasping new concepts. Learning.

This weekend I move via car,
to visit friends and family in
Indianapolis - fish fry, girls night out,
lunches with friends galore. Moving never
felt so lovely - I am home.

6 Word Fridays: Exchange

If you don't try it ... you might not know you like it ... 6 Word Fridays!  This week's word is 'exchange.'

****************

I exchanged my free time for
a ride into Amish and Mennonite
country.  Traded fast highways for county
roads and following a one horse
buggy.  Hoosier Guy and I were
on a mission: fresh local food.

We entered the produce auction in
awe.  Aisles and aisles of nature's
bounty: pears, apples, potatoes, cabbages, corn,
peaches, pumpkins, cushaws, peppers, mums, melons.
All in large quantity, all waiting
for a buyer, two or three.

I bought some molasses cookies - yum!
We had our bidder number - ready
I stood back, watching the auctioneer
move through the aisles, auctioning off
the hard work of my neighbors.

In the end, we exchanged money
for delicious, home-grown veggies, fruits and
baked goods.  Little green slips of
paper for a summer's efforts by
my Amish and Mennonite neighbors.  Hoosier Guy
bought some tomatoes from a girl
was buying a new dress with
her proceeds.  Others had similiar goals.

They thought the exchange was fair,
I wondered how we could process
our auction bounty in a timely
manner - tomatoes yesterday, peaches are tomorrow!

The Oatmeal - really, go there now.

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/minor_differences4

I know I've mentioned the Oatmeal before, but really, folks, if you aren't checking out his work, for shame.

(gets out her fingers, making the 'shame shame' motion)

This is the latest installment in Minor Differences - so worthy, please check it out.

For the record, this one made me laugh especially hard.  I'm 37 and Hoosier Guy's kid is rapidly approaching 17.  He is in luuuuuuvvvvv with a girl and after hearing his grandmother tell me about how she watched he and his girlfriend make out all afternoon, well, this one was a little too close to home not to share.

And no, I've not smothered Hoosier Guy with a pillow.  Nor has he threatened to smother me.  All good. :)

6 Word Fridays: Easy

 This week's word is 'easy' and I'm back ....

Easy living is a life well lived,
from my walk to the postoffice
to a meander for delicious gelato
I'm loving my time here in
small town Indiana.  The pace is
calm, the setting picturesque, truly Rockwell.

Then I take my easy life
to Chicago, via train, 3x week
Still easy - sit back, relax, ride
click clack sounds of train wheels
taking me to my other life
the life of a Ph.D. student

The readings are challenging, the work
is thoughtful, I am happy here.
From leafy green rural Indiana town
to booming, teeming, big Chicago city,
I am happy - it's easy here.