5.5 Weeks and Counting

I am now down to 5.5 weeks in Southwest Florida.  I've officially lived here two years now and I have a few general observations:

1.  It is hot from April 1 - November 1.  When I say "hot," I mean 90+ degrees with 90%+ humidity.  This is not exaggeration.  I will not miss the heat.

2. April 1 - November 1 is what I call "winter" in Southwest Florida.  Same premise as Indiana -- when it is cold cold cold, you stay indoors and try to stay warm.  In this area of Florida you stay indoors and try to stay cool.

3.  The Sun Is No Joke down here.  SPF 70 has been my friend.  My dermatologist says I have great skin (sunscreen sunscreen + white girl skin that doesn't tan anyway has its benefits).

4. I've had more visitors here than I ever had in Indy.  I've really loved that.

5. I've made good friends here and I'm thankful.  I will miss them all.

6. I've also been lonelier here than I have ever been -- I've had to learn to enjoy my own company more.  In Indy I had a wide circle of friends with something going on constantly -- here I have a few friends and they have limited time. 

6 Word Fridays: Kind

This week’s Six Word Fridays topic: KIND. Be kind? Of a kind? Kind of sort of? Kindly share six words with us, won’t you?  (Thanks Melissa, as ever, if you want to see more (and YOU DO) go to http://www.makingthingsup.com/)

I try to live my life
by being kind.  Being kinder than
some folks deserve, sure, I admit.

Be kind in the face of
hateful, despite unpleasantness, aside from rude.
Being kind is not being naive,
it is choosing to be nice.
Above all, it is your choice.
And rude, hateful, horrible, nasty people
won't make that choice for me.

KC ... also known as foodaloo

http://foodaloo.wordpress.com/

Dear readers, please welcome KC to the blogroll.  She's my friend here in SW Florida who is girl genius with wine, food and merriment.  She has a darling, precious little girl with her Italian husband.

Read her blog, learn something.  I do and I will.

:)

The Email That I Don't Want

Hello Athena,


I just wanted to say hello and check to see how you were doing. I have a new phone number xxx-xxx-xxxx, if you ever want to get in touch with me. I was just thinking about you today and wanted to say hello.

Talk to you soon,

Jack
*******************************************************************

For those of you playing along at home, Jack was a guy I dated a few years ago. He and I met thru a dating site, where he proclaimed to be divorced for three years, single now, no kids.

I later found out that: 1) he wasn't divorced, had never been divorced; 2) was, in fact, married to a very nice woman and 3) wasn't apparently planning on divorcing, just liked to cheat.  Oh, and his wife said they'd had a number of problems in their 12 (!) year marriage but she always hoped he'd change.

Oh Sister, Love May Be Blind, but You've Gouged Out Your EYES.

Since that time, I've not been in contact with him.  I have received a few emails from him (like the one above, received at my work email account last night), but have steadfastly ignored him. 

I will continue to do so.

'Talk to you soon' -- how's never, Jack?  Never good for you?  Good for me.

6 Word Fridays: Near

This week’s (not sunburn-related) Six Word Fridays topic: NEAR. Near and dear? Nearly there? Drawing near? (see more at www.makingthingsup.com) Thanks Melissa!



Time draws close, time draws near

to say goodbye to Southwest Florida

my home for nearly two years.

I came near to making this

my permanent home -- with real estate

purchase eminent and big plans made. 

Looking back, this near miss was

profound.  It caused me to reevaluate

what it was I wanted -- period.

Nearly a year later, I sit

amidst packing boxes, to do lists,

class schedules and a renewed purpose.

Near miss?  No -- a course correction

to the future I dreamed about

nearly a year ago this month.

Kids.

In the last 24 hours, I've heard from friends about their kids.  From the cutest video ever (!) to a horrid story of a kid who knows better and was taught better doing an unbelieveably boneheaded thing.

It makes me think.

Here I am -- 37 years of age, no kids, no prospects for kids on the horizon.  Am I missing something?  Am I truly fulfilled by my no kid life?  What will life be like when I live with Hoosier Guy and his kids?  Will that truly show me what having kids is all about or will it be just an open window into that life?

The first time I talked about having kids was with my first fiance.  He wanted kids before he was 30 (he was 6 years older than I) and I balked.  I didn't want kids at 24.

The next time I talked about kids was with the Hex.  We got married when I was 29 and we talked about having a kiddo in the next few years of our marriage, as he had a son and wanted another child.  By year two, I knew we weren't going to have kids and I wanted to revisit the notion of marriage itself.  By year three, we were in the process of divorce. 

After that episode, I pretty much resigned myself to no kids, not unless I met someone with kids or who wanted to have a kid.  I like kids, I like other people's kids, I enjoy being around kids -- I just don't have any.

It is times like the last 24 hours that I realize that parenting and children are a series of high highs and low lows, much like life itself.

I'm sure my friends who are parents will tell me I've missed out on the experience of having children.  They are right -- I have. 

What I haven't missed out on is the experience of being around children -- and for that I am profoundly grateful. 

What A Weekend.

I was a whirling dervish of activity and fun --

Friday was dinner with my extended family here -- big fun, lots of wine, good times.

Saturday was hauling furniture from A to B and from C to A, a stop at the fleamarket for some necklace restringing, making pies and veggie pizza for dinner with friends.

Sunday was lunch with friends in St. Pete, dinner with Dad, Stepmom and Stepgrandma in Gibsonton and then a return home.  Finished some laundry, got my day completed.

I was tired when I passed out last night.  Still a little tired today.  It is clear I have a lot to do and not a lot of time.

55 Days until I move.

Wow.

6 Word Fridays: Joy

Check out more at http://www.makingthingsup.com/ ...

Thanks Melissa ... this week's word is joy.

**********************************

Joy defined -- for me at least --

is laughter of a delighted child

at a new surprise, moment, thought

Joy defined for my own life

is sharing my life with friends

and family.  Taking time to truly

communicate with each other. Beyond words.

Joy is that feeling I get

when I think about my life

and how damn lucky I am

to have loads of friends, loving

family, new opportunities and life 2.0.

Postscript ... the pictures ...

My Mom and my cousin both loved the pictures they received from my box of keepsakes.  There were some from 10+ years back in there and it was good to see people as they were then.

It reminded me, though, that I have work to do personally.  This weight is not going to come off by itself, so I have to giddy'up in that department.  Told Hoosier Guy this weekend that my food intake was going to be restricted and he said he'd do whatever to support me.

I can't believe it is June 1.  Where did this year go?

6 Word Fridays: Kept

Thanks Melissa -- for more entries, see http://www.makingthingsup.com/

*****************************************************

I think I've kept every single

solitary piece of paper ever touched

by me, someone I love, or

well, anyone.  Journals, wedding programs, letters,

countless scraps of paper. These pale

in comparison to the pictures. Oh

yes, the pictures -- thousands of them.

Hauled to six addresses in thirteen years.

A small cedar box holds things

precious beyond words -- pictures, obituaries, announcements

each of them tied to someone

who was or is very important. 

But this is more than that --

it is the 42 inch tall

box filled with paper, photos, memories.

I've kept them all, in a

box for the last thirteen years.

Added to it, sure, many times.

Subtracted?  Never -- not until this moment.

I finally tackled the memory mountain

determined what was to be kept

and what could be given away.

It was freeing, frightening and necessary.

I have memories in my head

I kept those, safe and sound.

Paper isn't memories.  Photos aren't memories.

Scraps of paper are not memories.

Those are remnants of time passed.

So I kept all my memories

Kept some photos, paper, letters.

And let the rest say goodbye.

*******************************************
Wow, Melissa, you are good with the timely topics of late.  I spent last Saturday wading through my guest room, determining what could be kept and what could go to trash, Goodwill or friends. 

I mailed off 10 letters yesterday -- to friends -- with photos that they may not have seen or knew existed.  I hope they enjoy them.  I did when I found them, but I also knew that I was not going to keep them further -- so I blessed someone else.  If you are someone who received a letter with photos -- just know that you do not have to keep them 13 years in a box -- you can look at them, enjoy them and let them go if you like. Do not be strangled by the tyrrany of stuff -- I am trying not to be.